i think one of the things that’s very

interesting about family law

is that you do have that personal

connection and contact with a client

who

you know

that the work you’re doing for them

is making a difference in their life

because you can kind of see it

as the case progresses and what’s going

on in the case

i had practiced other areas of law

uh prior to focusing entirely on family

law over 20 years ago

and you know when you’re dealing with

corporate clients and stuff and you have

your contact at the

you know the office of the corporate

client and you tell them how this

hearing went and boy we had this

excellent result today

and i’ll never forget an experience

where i just kind of heard the person on

the other end you know clicking the

keyboard and you know doing the input

because they needed to report to their

supervisor or you know their direct

report what had happened

and that’s what’s so different about

family law because

we’re we’re dealing with an aspect of

the law that’s extremely personal

with respect to the client it goes to

the core of who they are

and it’s and it so impacts their life

and what their life is going to be going

forward

so i really appreciate that connection

and i think more specifically in terms

of a reward in that regard

it’s so

satisfying

not only to obtain

a good and fair and decent result at the

end of the case whether that be achieved

through a mediated result or through

trial

litigated result

seeing someone

uh who grows through the process

and is able to take control of their

life in a way that they may not have

seen as being possible when they started

the process

because their life was so intricately

woven before within that

duo dynamic and now they’re on their own

and making things work but it’s it’s

very interesting and and rewarding

working with a team and and watching

that happen

as they progress through the course of a

case that you know sometimes frankly can

can take a year or more to resolve

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you know there are certain

givens that we always seem to come back

to and in the modern area era

one of them is you know

don’t uh disparage or post anything

about the case or the other party on

social media that’s a common one

but

in terms of something that’s i think

just kind of um

from an overarching standpoint rather

impactful

and

this is not necessarily my original idea

but the advice that

remember that divorce is part of your

life right now

life is not part of your divorce

and what we mean by that when when we

say it

is

as you’re going through this process and

you have a dispute and you’re trying to

resolve it perhaps requiring litigation

perhaps the stakes are high

don’t

make decisions that would be

disadvantageous to you in terms of your

overall life

just because you think it’s strategic or

helpful to you in the divorce

and examples of that can include

a party that’s receiving

child and spousal support from the other

party

all of a sudden having a new job

opportunity that would increase their

earnings

you know advice would be don’t give up a

great opportunity that could really

impact your life in a wonderful way

because you’re concerned about the

results on the from the support

perspective necessarily right

and there are practical reasons why that

shouldn’t be such a huge concern first

of all

you know legally

um

you know

a dollar that you earn from your own

earnings doesn’t necessarily and in fact

doesn’t translate directly to a dollar

for dollar reduction in the amount of

support you receive so that’s one reason

not to do that another example of it

would be

uh say in a child custody scenario maybe

someone is afraid

well what’s it gonna look like if i

start seeing other people or i start

dating having relationships or you know

a significant relationship

you know not too long after i’ve

separated or while the divorce is

ongoing and how will that look

particularly in a child custody context

again if something meaningful comes into

your life

you know

you know don’t pass it up because of

that there are obviously issues to be

looked at particularly in a child

custody standpoint you use good judgment

you know you consult with your lawyers

about

when i’m getting serious about someone

what’s the appropriate time to introduce

them to my child or children

you know making good judgment calls

about not having that person

necessarily be involved right away in in

any of the parenting work

and certainly not letting any you know

baggage that that person have affect the

children those are the kinds of things

you should be thinking about not not

giving up opportunities so i think

that’s you know maybe kind of a um kind

of a cornerstone piece of advice that

you know generally applies in almost

every case