St. Paul, MN family law attorney Thomas Tuft shares his advice for people facing divorce. He acknowledges that it is often very difficult for people to separate their emotions from the practical steps required in a divorce. That challenge, he notes, is something nearly every client struggles with. He makes it a priority to check in regularly with his clients, ensuring they have the support they need—whether from family, friends, or, when necessary, professional resources to help manage the stress, anxiety, or depression that can accompany the process. He believes making sure his clients are fully supported is an essential starting point.

From there, he advises clients to avoid fighting over minor issues and instead focus on identifying the key matters that truly matter. In most cases, he explains, those core issues involve the children. Custody and parenting decisions often draw the line in the sand, while other disputes can usually be worked out. This approach also allows him, as the attorney, more flexibility. Often, the priorities of one parent differ from those of the other, creating opportunities for compromise—such as trading off between a pension and a house. By identifying which issues are worth fighting for and which can be negotiated, he helps clients move through the process more effectively and with less conflict.