you know mediation is one form of what
is called alternative dispute resolution
okay it’s just one of many others that
people have probably heard of our
arbitration that’s probably the other
most common the way a mediation works is
in in a divorce situation is typically
you’re gonna have say my client and I
are going to be in one room the opposing
lawyer and his client are going to be in
the other room and then you’ve got the
mediator and the mediator is going to go
back and forth between the rooms trying
to facilitate a resolution to all of the
issues so if you got child custody
issues they’re gonna resolve all of that
including child support you know what’s
the conservatorship going to be what how
are those rights and duties going to be
it’s going to be set forth or each party
going to have the independent right on
certain rights and duties are they going
to be exclusive are they going to be
subject to the agreement of the other
party then they’re also going to deal
with the property division aspect and so
the mediator goes back and forth and
he’s going to come in and ask us you
know certain questions and he’s trying
to find out he or she is trying to find
out what the strengths of our case are
and the weaknesses as well as the
strengths and weaknesses of the other
person or of the other side and so what
that mediators job is and this is this
is what’s really important I think for
people to understand that mediator has
one job in one job only and that is to
try to reach a settlement doesn’t have a
damn thing to do with a fair and
equitable settlement it is to try to get
a settlement so what you see a lot of
the time in this process is the mediator
is going to play devil’s advocate you
know when they’re coming in and talking
to me and my client a lot of the time
what they’re going to be asking what
about this or what about that well isn’t
this a problem that y’all have here do
you have a difficulty in proving this
aspect and they’re doing the same thing
in the other room and so that’s where I
think a lot of the time people get
confused as they think well you know
doesn’t the mediator you know kind of
sit in the position of a judge and the
answer is absolutely not okay the a
mediator cannot force anything on
anyone it is a situation where you
control the outcome you have the ability
to decide I am in agreement with this or
I am NOT in agreement with that and you
can settle on that basis or you can
decide not to settle and that’s the
reason we’ve got the people in the black
robes that are there to make a decision
if we want to go to court so that
mediators going to come in and look at
the strengths and weaknesses of both
both both parties and is going to try to
bring them closer based on those
strengths and weaknesses so that
hopefully you end up with a resolution